our door is always open.

so listen. my parent's house has a problem.
called birds love to come inside.

i remember one time when i was younger, we had the doors open because it was a lovely december day (be jealous if you don't live in arizona). and a bird flew in the house. and then, it flew over to the christmas tree (probably because it thought it was still outside because, really, trees are not supposed to be in a house) and just perched right on top. naturally, everyone in the house freaked out. there was a broom involved. which, understandably so, freaked out the bird. and the end result was a knocked over christmas tree and a bird shooed outside.

now that you're all aware of the bird problem we have, let me tell you a story.

my mom called me this morning at 9:40. i was at work, but she never calls me when i'm at work so i was like, probably i should answer the phone. and so i answered the phone. this conversation happened...
mom: are you at work?
me: of course i'm at work, it's 9:40.
mom: well can you come to my house?
me: um... what's wrong? why do i need to come to the house?
mom: because there is a bird in the house and dad thought he got it out before he left for work but it just showed up in the family room again and i'm scared.
me: seriously?
mom: yes, please come home.

so i left work. and went home to "help" my mom get the bird out. when i arrived at home, my mom had a broom in hand. a very useful weapon against birds apparently. she handed it to me and told me to go at it.
well the bird made an appearance and let's just say there was lots of screaming all up in the house.

we were both freaking out.

like, a lot.

obviously i wasn't the best helper. so we had to wake my cousin up (yes, he was sleeping at 9:40 AM.). my mom embarrassingly told him that we were scared because there was a bird in the house and pretty please would he come get it out for us.

within seconds, he was up. grabbed the broom. and then, just like that, the bird was gone. i still don't know how he did it without even flinching. because lemme tell you, birds are okay in their natural environment. as in, outside. i mean, when birds are outside it's no big deal.

but when they come in your house, it is not okay.

moral of the story: if it's nice out, open a SCREENED window. not a door. else a bird might fly in.

p.s. yes, it pooped in the house. lovely.

happy happy day.

http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=EBODJZ73ejc&desktop_uri=%2Fwatch%3Fv%3DEBODJZ73ejc

happy easter!! He is risen. 

in other great news, conference is this coming weekend. soooo freaking excited. 

boom.

i was bold.

boom.

20 seconds of insane courage. that was me.  thanks abner for the video, girrrl.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZmMFIganRQY

bridgett.

sometimes, you just gotta be bold.

and so that is what i am going to do.
on thursday.

probably it just really needs to be thursday fast.

until then, i will be channeling my inner-bridgett (aka bridgett from sisterhood of the traveling pants who is just all about being bold and beautiful) and giving myself friendly pep talks that go something like this: being bold is awesome. also, sometimes it is stupid. but mostly awesome. so be bold.

hopefully, the result of this boldness will be awesome.

i will let you know. because guess what?? i am gonna give this blogging thing a go again. who knows, it may even last more than two months this time...

eye. rolls.

remember how i hate the new blogger?
well i just have one more complaint to make before i get onto much more exciting things.

here is my complaint.

instead of saying "0 comments" it now says "No comments" when no one has commented.  now maybe i am just a weirdy, but seeing 0 is much less depressing than seeing NO.  as in NO ONE had anything to say about this post.  NO ONE cares.  melodramatic much?  okay maybe.  but i'm over it.

moving on...

so my sister reminded me that i left out a very important story in my last post.  so i thought i'd share.  this is what went down.

it was play time.

and i was playing.

with the kids, obviously, since that was my job.

so i'm playing.  and i'm pretty sure i was working on a puzzle with M.
then he said something that 1st graders say, i don't even remember what.

then this happened:

M: miss amy, what does this mean?
cue the most dramatic eye roll of your entire human life.  (i swear his eyes rolled into the back of his head and then around again.)
me:  why would you ask that M?
M:  because you just did it.

oh my gosh.  remember how i am the worst person ever sometimes?  this is one of those times.  i mean, who rolls their eyes at a 1st grader?  oh, just me.

now please let me try and explain myself.  i have a good excuse, i promise.

that excuse being, i have absolutely no control over my eye rolls.

i am serious, people.  it is so ingrained in me that i cannot help when it happens.  they just roll when stupid things happen.  or obnoxious things.  or annoying things.  or funny things.  so basically i am rolling my eyes all the time.  and i do not even mean to nor do i know that i'm doing it!  i have been working at a camp this summer (i'll post details about that another day), but honestly, at least five of the guys i work with have commented on my eye roll.  and i don't know what to tell them.  one of them said he was going to try and figure out what the eye roll meant.  i said, good luck, i do not even know what the eye roll means.

and just so you know i'm not a crazy person, let me just tell you that my sister has this same habit.  maybe she has more control over it than i do.  or maybe not.  i've never actually asked her about it.  but that's irrelevant.  what's relevant is, that the eye roll is so popular it has a name.  "the allen girl eye roll."  yeah, we're cool, i know.  i mean, who else can say their eye roll is so (in)famous it has a name??

sometimes.

sometimes, i really miss my old job.
you see, i used to be a teacher's aide.  best job ever?  i think yes.

because kids are the greatest.  and spending all day with 3-5 year olds is pure bliss (most of the time).  also hilarious.  because they say things like this:

T:  "coffee is like hot cocoa but with lots more bubbles!"

S:  "when my mom makes disgusting food, we give it to our dog."

L:  "we are gonna be best friends forever.  come on carson."
C:  "um. my name is connor."

out of nowhere, i hear the loudest screeching noise of my entire human life.
me:  "B, what was that?"
B:  "that was a dying cat."

me:  "A, i like your haircut."
A:  "yeah!  i'm not wolfman anymore!"

T exiting the bathroom:  "there's no more pee left."

H had a cut on his finger so i asked what happened. he looked at me. then at his finger.  then back at me, with a thoughtful expression.  and then he replied...
"well...my skin fell off!"

BURRRRP.
me:  "A, what do you say?"
A:  "thank you!!"
i was going for excuse me, but i'll take it.


after telling B's mom about her accident at school, her mom turns to her and says:  "B, i told you if you pee on their floor you can't come back to school."
B's quick reply: "but it wasn't on the floor!  it was on the chair!"
technically, it WAS on the chair....


and of course, my personal favorite:
N:  "i don't like you miss amy.....(long, dramatic pause)....
I LOVE YOU!"

i love you too, kiddos.  and i miss you.  lots.

sweet dreams.

do you ever have things happen in your real live life.  and it feels like it's happened before.  or you knew it was going to happen.  like you dreamed about it.

i mean, i guess that's kinda what the term de ja vu is for.

but this isn't like chunks of time i'm talking about here.  i'm talking about small, insignificant things.  like opening a new toothbrush that is blue and feeling like you knew, you just KNEW, that was going to happen.  like you dreamed about it.

because if that doesn't ever happen to you then i think i am officially going crazy.  because it has happened to me quite a few times lately.  trippy.