So listen. I don’t know what it is, but when I’m blog-storming (that is, brainstorming for the blog abbreviated—so clever am I), it seems there is a theme. And I do not understand this theme. Because really I am no expert on the subject. In fact, I rarely discuss the subject because I know so little about it. And yet, I have all these great blog post ideas about this particular subject.
I’m sure you’re all dying to know what it is, huh? I guess I’ll be a darling and tell you.
My blog-storming theme these days is cars.
Cars!
Seriously?? Seriously.
“Are you a man blogger?” one may ask after such a revelation.
No, I am female. And I’m assuming 99.9% of my readers are also females, if not 100%. So writing about car matters isn’t exactly appropriate for enlarging my audience, now is it? Nope. Not at all. Good thing I’m not too concerned about the size of my reading pool. Probs it’s shrinking by the minute. But whatevs. So here are my latest thoughts about cars.
I was on a date on Friday night (shocker, I know). Whilst on this first date, my date offered to teach me how to drive stick shift. Because during the course of our conversation, he discovered that I am a 21-year old failure who has never driven stick shift before. My thought on this matter: Who cares? I don’t even own a stick shift car.
But.
Every man’s thought on this matter upon discovering this travesty: Ooh, I will show off my manliness by teaching you something. Called how to drive stick shift.
I cannot count on one hand the number of men who have offered to teach me how to learn stick shift. Pretty sure there have been at least 8 offers (and considering the few dates I have been on, this is quite a lot). All offers have been made while I was on a date with the boy/man.
And yet, here I remain—without any knowledge of driving a stick shift vehicle. Wanna know why? Because, although these guys are so very gracious to offer, it seems two seconds after the offer is made, they disappear from my life. It’s a recurring theme. I’ve come to recognize it. And so whenever any man offers to teach me to drive stick shift, I say: “Sure! That would be so great.” But I’m really thinking: “That’s never in a million years gonna happen because probs I'll never see you again. Which is really too bad. Because if you did stick around and teach me something, I would give you a shout out on my blog. You missed out. See you never."
